This is an ever-evolving inner reality bombarding my cells lately. I know, weird! But true. I’m experiencing curious physical sensations, subtle nudges to my nervous system. These pulses seem to be signals, in-forming a thought, a desire to be spoken aloud into this world. IT is my cellular truth!
Still, I toggle between the act of Creating (DO-ing) and Co-creating (Be-ing). Doing, impressed upon me at a young age, carries the expectation of achieving social, familial and cultural success. If I’m going to be somebody, make my mark, leave a legacy, influence the world, then I had better perform, e.g., initiate, manipulate and fixate on the vision and MAKE IT HAPPEN …or I fail.
After many “failures” I had to ask myself, How’s that working out?
It wasn’t. I was asking the wrong questions, working for the wrong goals and insisting on pushing through no matter the cost. In the end, both my body and spirit were near a breaking-point.
Enter, The Mystery.
Circumstances become powerful mollifiers. I had to learn to allow…let go…surrender. I can’t speak for you, but this is no quick fix. The choice to surrender looms large on my spiritual path. IF I am to grow, become conscious of who I truly am, I would have to be still, tune to my cells, listen and allow the potential of what I’ve already created to manifest. In other words, become a co-creative force with universal flow.
A musical case in point:
For the last couple of years a new musical work featuring the alchemy crystal bowls has been elbowing its way into form. Serendipitously, a collaboration was born between myself and a wonderful artist, a Grammy nominee. We explored our musical pairing, loved it and envisioned its potential in the marketplace. It was thrilling. Yet there were rolling challenges and eventually the project was side-lined.
Timing is everything, right?
…and letting go is essential for what really wants to be birthed.
Months later, I found myself on an unexpected zoom call and these words exploded out of my iPad,
“We’d like you to bring your bowls and record in our state-of-the-art recording studio…for a week! All expenses paid. We love what you do and wish to support your music. Your’s is one of the gifts we want to share with the world.”
Stunned, speechless and humbled.
The music I created last April, nurtured in space and time with sound and harmony and two extraordinarily talented recording engineers at the board, the crystal music came alive; binaural, harmonic and everything in between. The imprint of this divine reflection was my willingness to allow and be transformed at a whole other level.
Clearly, only when I was ready, could this happen.
Once I let go, all unforeseen forces conspire to support this next level of co-creative expression, and right now it is experienced in the music.
In a couple weeks, October 6, I’ll have a virtual CD launch for one of the two creative projects I completed that glorious week. I’ll go live on Facebook and share a bit of the work, how the bowls taught me to play and my musical journey along the way.
Join me as we soar on a magic carpet of crystal sound energy into the waiting long tones of the Mother.